Top Ten Reasons to NOT Play Golf


1. I don’t have the right hair cut for it. Really. I have this disjointed thing goin’ on that everyone loves, but its not right for visors or ponytails.

2. I get poison ivy whenever I am near the woods and I go there often with my drives.

3. I have a novel in waiting. My characters live in early 1900’s, they just wouldn’t understand. They don’t make a move without me.

4. My sister looks better than I do in the chic golf clothes that she sells.

5. My son can outplay me, though I outweigh him.

6. My husbands swears a lot when he is on the course, and I like to retain my view of him as calm and humble.

7. I am opposed to drinking and driving (a ball or a cart) at the same time.

8. One never has enough balls….

9. Number 18 at O’Bannon finishes at the clubhouse, with a veranda full of people in view, just waiting for my errant shot. I would hate to get sued….

10. Really. Novel. Still. Waiting.

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1 Comment

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One response to “Top Ten Reasons to NOT Play Golf

  1. 1. I don’t have the right hair cut for it. Really. I have this disjointed thing goin’ on that everyone loves, but its not right for visors or ponytails.

    Annette, your hair is lovely, thanks to Eva, and suitable for a visor. Blowdryers in the ladies locker room puts your hair back where it belongs.

    2. I get poison ivy whenever I am near the woods and I go there often with my drives.

    Do not search for your balls then if they are wayward. Never got poison ivy on a golf course, and I'm allergic too.

    3. I have a novel in waiting. My characters live in early 1900’s, they just wouldn’t understand. They don’t make a move without me.

    I have a book going too. No excuse.
    They will understand and appreciate your new venture.

    4. My sister looks better than I do in the chic golf clothes that she sells.

    I doubt that even though I've not met your sister. The size 2's are always on sale. Jamie Saddock the best.

    5. My son can outplay me, though I outweigh him.
    Practice, it's fun to beat your son. I do it all the time. Puts 'em in their places.

    6. My husbands swears a lot when he is on the course, and I like to retain my view of him as calm and humble.

    Part of the joy of golf. Cursing. Have to keep the volume low on the courses which do not allow cursing so as to not get kicked off.

    7. I am opposed to drinking and driving (a ball or a cart) at the same time.

    Oh my, another true joy in the game of golf, drinking, driving and hitting a golf ball.

    8. One never has enough balls….

    Won't go there, but trust me I have enough balls.

    9. Number 18 at O’Bannon finishes at the clubhouse, with a veranda full of people in view, just waiting for my errant shot. I would hate to get sued….

    Pretend you are hitting for a big win on a big tour. Cures the nerves.

    10. Really. Novel. Still. Waiting.

    Really, no excuse.

    Like

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